New Years Funkalutions
I don’t do resolutions.
Well, technically I resolve to improve all the time but not specifically because of a new year. Call it my stubborn Italian streak but I don't like doing things because I 'have to.' I have much more success in making changes when I genuinely 'want to.'
Lately I'm working on time management, completing projects when I start them, not getting stuck in the social media time warp. I have to say the biggest obstacle I'm resolving to remove is fear. I’m afraid to paint because it won’t be good enough, I’m afraid to write because my words will be mediocre, I'm afraid if I show my true self that no one will like me.
Fear is one of those things that gets in the way of vulnerability- a trait that I've learned to take on as a massive source of strength and power.
Fear is one of those things that gets in the way of vulnerability- a trait that I've learned to take on as a massive source of strength and power.
Here's to a 2016 with more vulnerabilty, honesty and less fear. I like how that sounds- much more realistic than setting a list of easily breakable resolutions.
Ok here goes *shudder*
This year I’m going to write a book.
This book has been started, then discarded, over many years. I struggled with what I wanted to say and with how to write without a filter.
There. I said it. Now you can hold me accountable as I go and wash my granny panties (because I was scared shitless to tell you that).
I used to tell people about every grand idea I ever had. Starting such-and-such a website, project, degree. And I learned to stop telling people about my brainstorms until they were already complete or at least underway. If something didn't pan out I would suffer in silence. Now I think perhaps there is a better way.
Let me explain.
Putting it all out there on the line (along with embarrassing undergarments) can be terrifying if not bodily fluid inducing. If I'm honest I will tell you that in a way- I'm relieved I told you about the book. If I don't complete it we could look at it as a failure or we could look at it as: "Well shoot- I tried to accomplish this goal and now I'm disappointed." And I think the latter will promote a heck of a lot more support and empathy.
The point is to be more honest, vulnerable, real and you may just be surprised at the results.
This book has been started, then discarded, over many years. I struggled with what I wanted to say and with how to write without a filter.
There. I said it. Now you can hold me accountable as I go and wash my granny panties (because I was scared shitless to tell you that).
I used to tell people about every grand idea I ever had. Starting such-and-such a website, project, degree. And I learned to stop telling people about my brainstorms until they were already complete or at least underway. If something didn't pan out I would suffer in silence. Now I think perhaps there is a better way.
Let me explain.
Putting it all out there on the line (along with embarrassing undergarments) can be terrifying if not bodily fluid inducing. If I'm honest I will tell you that in a way- I'm relieved I told you about the book. If I don't complete it we could look at it as a failure or we could look at it as: "Well shoot- I tried to accomplish this goal and now I'm disappointed." And I think the latter will promote a heck of a lot more support and empathy.
The point is to be more honest, vulnerable, real and you may just be surprised at the results.
What's my book about? Sorry to disappoint but it's about me. It's not advice or a how to guide. Just the story of how I was able to rediscover my identity through creativity. At best, I hope it can inspire, at the least I hope you find it an interesting story.
Thanks for being there. Let's see where the the pen (keyboard) takes us.
posted by Unknown @ 3:21 PM
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